Thursday, October 23, 2008

Skanks and Cranks and a Broken Record *Update at bottom*

Well, McDonald's is at it again. Featured this week: Trampy Slutty-Ass Ho Barbie with a flattering Joe Pesci hairline and kicky lime green wedge espadrilles.

On other fronts, I give you the featured primetime programming around here:

Although, last night he did go 4 hours in between feedings, which is a record. Though, I was holding him all those hours. John is gone for the weekend, and the house is trashed. Do I sound like a broken record? I think is is my New Reality. I purposely invited people over for dinner tonight to force myself to get this place semi-cleaned up because I cannot take another minute of the house being such a wreck. Also, I figure it will make the hard evening hours go by faster if Becca has some kids to play with and I have another adult around. But, now I'm wondering how I could be so stupid. When, exactly do I think I'm going to be cleaning up? During naptime? Surely not.

I am definitely stupid. Definitely. Yes, the main part of the house is somewhat cleaner than it was but the germ factor is worse. And the kids went down to the basement (which was clean) and trashed it. And worse, WORSE, Wet Phlegmy was here and apparently her cough has gotten even wetter and phlegmier than it was last week. I was sure she would be better by now. And, worse still, she just hacked her phlegm all over my house this week.

Then, when Andrew was in the swing, I saw her standing right over him, her mouth about 2 inches from his. I swooped in there and picked him up so fast I think I gave everyone whiplash. Including myself.

The three kids that were invited over are a bit.....wild. They hit and scream and bellow and throw things and bang things and gag at dinner and yell at their mom and put their feet on the table and hack their wet phlegm all over the table and put their mouths and noses on my baby. One of them had an ear infection, one of them had the cough, and the other one complained his stomach was hurting.

Dear God.


Angie said...

Anyone having dinner at the house of someone with a tiny baby should not expect a clean house. It will be fine.

The Quinn Report said...

I did the same thing last night by inviting friends of ours over for dinner. Exactly, what was I thinking??? I barely had enough time to get the dinner on the table, let alone the house cleaned up! I just end up shoving all the shit in one room and telling everyone they can't go in there. I don't even know why I bother doing that because one of the kids always ends up opening and closing the door 100 x's which just draws attention to it all. Screw it!

Cheryl said...

Why do you still hang out with these people? Let alone invite them over? They stress me out and I don't even know them!

Katie said...

Cheryl...good question. I'm starting to wonder myself. I do like the mother, and I do like her daughter. She and Becca could be great friends. But, her two sons are another story. But one of the sons is twins with the daughter. So, I don't feel like I can just invite one of her kids over. Also, the mother has been a great support to me and is very helpful and friendly and I do like her. So I feel kind of stuck! She ALWAYS has everyone over to her house and then I know I need to reciprocate, but I just hate having large crowds of kids over here. But, I don't feel like I can take advantage of her hospitality, and then not do the same. I don't know...

Plus, Becca is in preschool with her twins, so it isn't like we aren't going to be exposed to all their germs in an indirect way, anyway.

What would y'all do?

Cheryl said...

After reading your're doing the right thing. Parenting puts you in awkward postions sometimes. Differing viewpoints with people you like a lot on such an important and touchy subject. I tend to be too rigid on it all. You're right too. If Becca is going to be exposed to it at school, bring it home to Andrew anyway, why stress about it too much? Still.....

Natalie said...

I have rules: I will not take my kids out of the house (unless to a dr's appt) if they have had a fever, vomiting or the shits in the past 24-48 hours. I also do not leave the house during the first 48hrs of a cold or if they have an especially runny nose or nasty cough.

There are two reasons for this: 1) My kids feel like crap or are recovering and feel "off." I remember how I feel the day after I puked my guts out-not good (drained, tired, etc). Taking kids out when they've just been sick or are coming down w/or are in the worst days of something, is nothing short of cruel. It's not about US, it's about them and parents who bring their sick kids to a party or playgroup, etc. are being selfish. A sick kid, generally, wants to be home - even if they are too young to say it.
2) I try to have the upmost respect for other parents and children, in general. Also, living in a military community, we are often (like you, Katie) on our own when our husband's are deployed or on TDY, w/o family nearby to help out when we need it. It's especially cruel to take kids out when you are around mother's (and kids) who's husband/spouse is away a lot.

Any mother who spends a couple of times, siting on the toilet, nursing an infant with a bucket in front of her, while her toddler clutches her stomach in pain, will start to see what I'm saying and smarten up.

Recently, a mother brought her kid to a playgroup hours after her had puked his guts out. Why she told me this, is beyond me. She said, "But, he seems fine now." I nearly started crying and left early. She does this ALL the time and I can't even count how many colds and high fever bugs I am SURE my kids have caught from her. If it happens again, I'm going to tell her what I think.

Some mothers have flat out told me the following: "well, it's going around. They are all going to get it anyway."

These mother's need to be slapped across the head. Have a little situational awareness and empathy people. And, respect for your kids!

I sound like the perfect mom; certainly I am not. But, this is one area that I don't find gray. It's not very hard to keep an ill child away from everyone else. Mother's who think I'm crazy and a germophobe, can kiss my a**.

Katie said...

So, how is the best way to approach this? "Hi! I'd like to invite your family over for dinner. Is everyone healthy?" I just don't know if I could do it. Since this woman obviously won't EVER back out of ANYTHING, I just don't know what I can do short of setting up a triage clinic to find out of her kids are sick or not!! :)

I agree with you. I personally TELL people when my kid has ANYTHING--even a runny nose. "Why, thanks for inviting us. We'd love to come, but Becca has a cough." Then, if they say they don't mind, fine. But if they say "Okay. Another time, then," I know that they really don't want her hacking on their kids.

Surprisingly, EVERYONE I know doesn't care. I am the only person who would back out of something. I guess I am a germaphobe and the rest of these people aren't. Which, really...would be so liberating.

Natalie said...

I wish I had the answer! I need help in this area too. I don't think I'd be so upset about mother's like this if I hadn't paid the price more than once. And, I don't "get" parents who don't care. Are they "happy go lucky" people who just roll w/the punches and have a lot of patience and positive attitudes ("oh, the vomiting will only last a day or two - we'll be great. Life is good...) Or, do they not care about their kids the way some other's do? Who knows what goes on behind some people's closed doors...sometimes a mother's careless attitude about bringing her sick child out in public makes me wonder what's really going on for her think it's okay.

Questions, questions and possibly no right answer. I think if we show up somewhere and people are sick, it's not rude to leave. Actually, you know what? I'm going to send an email this weekend to Modern Manner's guy and ask him to do a podcast on this! Hey, maybe I'll get lucky and he will - or he'll forward it on to Mommy Diva...

Cheryl said...

Can! get an 'Amen!' Natalie!! Totally agree. I'm the same way with Braden. If he's even slightly ill, we don't go anywhere or I, at least, forewarn people and give them the option of saying "please don't come over". Same if I'm sick and I know there are going to be kids around. Maybe it is having lived/living a lifestyle where husbands are gone and nobody is around to help. Not sure. Have to say Katie that the mommies I know here are just like us though. Keep the germs away! Have no tactful advice for you on how to handle thoughtless but cool Mom.