Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Better Off On Bourbon Street


Well, I have apparently screwed up my child for life. Again. I'm realizing it is fairly easy to do...this messing up your children. I seem to be getting pretty good at it. Give me another couple years to fully perfect it, but I'm getting there.

We went with our friends to their church tonight for a pancake dinner put on by a local boy scout troop. It was a Mardi Gras theme, complete with plastic beads. Though, there wasn't anyone drunk or topless (That I saw. But, I'm guessing the boy scouts would have been all for that--the topless, not the drunk. Or, maybe the drunk. I don't know. Who am I to say? I'm no boy scout.) Anyway. The tables had Mardi Gras beads and fake plastic coins and (doom. DOOM. DOOOOOOM!!!!!) plastic masks.

Oh lordy. Becca took one look at those masks and promptly lost. her. shit. Eyes shut, hands smacked over them and lots of screaming and shaking. It was as if there were bloody instruments of torture strewn about, so visceral and terrifying it was to her.

"Maskes are scary," she said. "I do NOT like maskes! I WANT TO GO HOME!" It was an exact repeat of this lovely day.

She spent the entire meal in my lap crying with her head buried, hands over her eyes, shaking. I wolfed down a few pancakes and we left, with Becca sobbing the entire way out about how she was NEVER GOING TO CHURCH AGAIN.

We might have been better off somewhere with drunk topless people.

Fat Tuesday: FAIL.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

How lucky can you get???

Anonymous said...

If only you had been at the great Austin Mardi Gras event. . .Huricanes (ala Pat O'Briens) Gumbo, and king cake (nobody got the baby. . .have to wait until breakfast). No masks, but lots of beads. Tell Becca that they don't do things that scary way in Minnesota. She would be safe there, but with Michael and William fighting over her.

Anonymous said...

Grammy Bon and Grampy Ralph made the BEST BEST gumbo EVER!!! They worked for hours to prepare it - wish you could have been here to enjoy it! Recipe came from America's Test Kitchen - and they followed it to the letter!!! We had fabulous Rosenblum zinfandel and raised toasts to you and the fam with Mumm Napa sparkling wine. Too bad we're not having any fun. Can't wait for you to get here next week...there MAY be some gumbo for you to try...if you get here before David does.

Anonymous said...

Hey atleast it wasnt Lutefisk & Mashed Potatoes. Now thats Scarey!!
We had some good Gumbo at the Village Inn in Pine City!! and some fantastic Red Beans & Rice!!
Looking forward to fridays fish frys!! Yummy!!

Anonymous said...

PS: Grandpa Jack Jr. got the baby this morning. He is feeling luckier by the minute. . .