Sunday, March 29, 2009

Angst and Humiliation

That's me, in the middle. At girl scout camp. Circa 1985. With two girls my own age. And I wondered why a boy called me "Mouse" in fourth grade. Look at my knees! Jesus. You can't even see them they are so small and knobby. I am practically invisible. No wonder I sucked at dodgeball and was humiliated in gym class repeatedly.

Speaking of humiliation. Behold my father.

Oh dear. We have a thick beard, a hat covered in fishing flies, a dead fish. Wow. So, maybe this would explain why I wanted him to drop me off across the street from school. And this one time, I almost died because dad drove me to school without a shirt on. Everyone would think a naked man was, like, driving me to school. Like, God! Parents are, like, so embarrassing.


Moving on.

And I thought my 40-year old mom's clothes were bad. She was, like, so out of style. *Angsty teenage eye roll* And she had the nerve to get pregnant when I was in fifth grade. Like, ew. All my friends will know what my gross parents were up to.

Let's zoom in, shall we? Acid washed denim skirts. Keds. White socks, folded down. Big belts. Big, BIG shirts tucked in. Don't you remember wadding up the piles of fabric under your waistband? And then pulling some of it back out to fluff it out? And the hair. Oh the hair. Is it just me, or do I look completely out of proportion? Like the top half of my body belongs to a Weeble, and the bottom half to a pencil?

Oh 1987, you bastard. You and your evil twin, Middle School.

10 comments:

Grammy Bonnie said...

Won't it be fun to see if Becca goes through her school years as the teeny one like you and her Nana did!

Natalie said...

These are great. My mother was too disorganized to keep any evidence like that around - wait, she actually has a big box of photos under her bed. I won't find her going through it unless she sees blogs like this!

The Quinn Report said...

Mine are scary bad too (and I thought I was so cool, of course!)

noelquinn01@hotmail.com is my email!

Jen said...

Oh, the 80s. So embarrassing to look back on. You and I had similar hairdos, except you looked better in yours.

Justine said...

Trust me... the seventies were worse.

Tracy said...

Oh the hair.. I remember it well. I also remember the big shirts. I seriously shopped at Stucture for a couple of years. Remember that place? Oh the keds. Of course I don't believe my parents would ever buy me the REAL keds, I always had the generic ones. Did I mention the hair? The 80's, may they RIP and NEVER come back.

Swistle said...

Oh indeed. I remember these very styles. And now I dress basically like your mom. (But I still scrunch my socks. You can take the girl out of the eighties, but...)

Laura said...

Just wait until our kids can make fun of us.

sgtsharp said...

Im glad I was hidding in the Marines & in Camo, during the 80s.
But the 70s were way worse. GAG!!!
But I do like the idea of driving Sarah to school with no shirt on!! Thanks for the idea,Katie.
Oh and how can your parents be embassering?? Your Parents where/are way cool!!

Bevo said...

Way cool! Did you catch that?