"If that doctor gives me another shot I'll SMASH HIM!"
"Daddy, Lambie thinks you're mean."
"You're a bad Mama. You have bad shoes* and bad feelings."
Never pay off a medical bill in full when someone else in the house is sick. Just trust me. Otherwise you'll find yourself in the hospital that night. And the next two nights after that.
John walked in the first morning Becca was in the hospital. She was lying down on her back, with the oxygen mask on her face. Rather like this.
John said, "Oh no. She is getting up and she needs to move. She is just going to lay there and get sicker and sicker. I hate hospitals. They make you worse. We have to get her out of here...." and on and on....and on. He really hates hospitals. Really. And I don't think he is even worrying about MRSA.
So, he started Daddy Boot Camp. Every so often, he would get her out of bed, unhook the monitors and the oxygen mask, roll the IV around behind her and make her walk laps around the room. She was all shaky and looked ashen and about to fall down at first. I was nearly panicked. But he persisted. Then, when she was back in bed, he would feed her. The nurses told me not to worry about food. As long as she had the IV, she shouldn't need it. Well, John wanted her to eat.
One evening, it didn't work out so well for him. He encouraged her to eat a good bit of dinner. Then, she tossed her cookies (actually, her pizza) all over him when he was getting her out of bed for her boot camp exercises. Since I was on the way to pick up my mom at the airport, I missed it (THANK GOD). It's not a real boot camp until someone vomits. When we got to the hospital, this is what we saw. (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACH. Why was my purse on the floor, people??? I am deathly afraid of hospital floors! Must sanitize it again.)
I think boot camp worked, though. It definitely helped her get some muscle strength back. She was running around the room by yesterday.
Actual quote: "Does anyone have an extra pillow, darlings?"
Here are the meals they brought for Becca from "Nutrition" in the hospital:
1. Fried Chicken tenders and french fries. Mandarin oranges.
2. Pizza. Apple sauce.
3. Grilled cheese and french fries. Banana pudding.
4. Sloppy joe, macaroni and cheese. Vanilla cake.
Not one single SHRED of fresh fruit or vegetables. In fact, not ANY fruits or vegetables in three days (unless you count mandarin oranges, which I do not.) Not one. In three days.
Now we're entering Mommy Boot Camp, which consists of healthier eating and attempting to get the naps back on schedule.
Why do you have to re-explain the entire illness from start to finish with each shift change? Do they not have charts? Do they not read them?
Why did multiple nurses come in the room and not even know why she was there? One thought it was for a stomach bug (maybe she was there during boot camp.)
Why do they ignore you for hours during the day and then come in every 10 minutes all night long?
Why do they tell me that I don't need to watch her oxygen monitor, because they are watching it "out there at the desk," but every time I went out there to the desk no one was in sight?
(I watched the monitor. All the time.)
Fun Game: How Many Grown Ups Does it Take.....
...to care for one kid in hospital, one baby at home?
--Two needed at the hospital. One to stay with kid at all times, one to run to the cafeteria, go find a nurse (never easy), get more apple juice, etc.
--One to care for baby.
--Another to run errands, take breast milk to the baby, bring new clothes for the boot camp seargant, answer the door and the phone.
You can scrape by with three, but I wouldn't recommend it.