Tuesday, March 24, 2009

How To Torture Your Mother

9:00 p.m.--Make sure you stay awake until this hour...just to get your mother to think she may get to sleep in a bit the next morning. Whine in bed a lot and cry about things. Scream "MY FINGER HURTS!" at the top of your lungs. When your mother comes in to tell you to be quiet, say, "BUT I don't WANT to go to school tomorrow." Then insist you aren't tired. Whine some more. Kick the walls.

11:30 p.m.--Wake up and cry really loudly for no apparent reason. Make sure it sounds like you've been injured.

12:30 a.m.--Have baby brother wake up to cry and eat.

1:30--Wake up and cry again. Even more loudly. When your mother runs in to see what disaster has befallen you, just whine and don't answer with any intelligible words.

2:30--Drop lamb out of bed and wake up crying loudly.

3:00--Have baby brother wake up to cry and eat.

6:00--Wake up for the day. Wake your brother up. Kick the walls loudly and then get up and slam your door open and shut in a dirty pull-up while yelling "MOMMMMY" at the top of your voice.

There. Torture complete. Smile.
*******
The verdict is in. I don't know why anyone would think they resemble each other.



There were 14 votes for Jack. Three votes each for me and John and two for Becca. I personally think he most resembles David and Becca. And I do see the resemblence with my dad but was surprised that everyone was so insistent on it! That was fun. I love that game.
*****
Now we're off to preschool and on the countdown to naptime. These rugrats BETTER take a good nap today or all bets are off. Though I must say, with the more springlike weather and the bright sun and blue skies, I am much less freaky about naps than I am in the winter. I know, right? I can't believe it either.

7 comments:

Natalie said...

Katie, you are a hoot. Olivia is just like Becca, ever single f**king day. She manipulates me back into her room every single night and I allow it b/c I am selfish. If I put her to bed at 7:30pm, I expect to have THREE full hours before I go to bed of QUIET bliss. If I can get her to SHUT THE HELL UP by 7:45, I will do whatever it takes. Need more water? No problem. Need me to turn a song on one last time? Sure. Need your blanket rearranged? IMGOINGTOKILLYOUYOULITTLESTUBBORNBRAT.
But, sure. Blanket rearranged.

Each night, I tell her she only gets one chance after I close the door and it's usually three chances. B/c I don't want to hear the Fing crying. I just want that quiet bliss. Especially this time of the year here - waves crashing against the shore, a slight breeze sending a floral scent into my house as I read blogs, read a book, watch TV drink wine, drink wine, drink wine....

Anonymous said...

Oh good...it's not just me!! I know all to well the mommy will keep coming back just to try to get you to BE QUIET game. Ugh. It's way frustrating! And boy do they learn fast that we are on a short leash. Also, I am much less freakish re: naps & bedtime in the spring/summer months.

Jen said...

Oh dear GOD. I KNOW. Now I know what my friend meant when she said 3 was the new 2. I seriously hope that 4 is much better. And that you got some SLEEP at naptime.

Tracy said...

get a nap?

Katie said...

Two hour nap! YES!

sgtsharp said...

JUst wait for the Teen yrs.

Angela said...

That made me tired reading it. For some reason, Luke has gotten to where he whines A LOT! And for some reason...my patience is wearing extremely thin. huh.