Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Things I Never Thought I'd Say Part 3

There's an ant in your ice cream? Oh well. Gobble it up and stop whining about it.

How did this Craisin get in my bra?

Please do not throw that toilet paper at me.

Do you have barf in your hair? Then, please, do not chew on it.

Who scattered these tampons all over the bathroom?

Do you have poop on your ankle again?

No. That isn't money. That's a beer bottle top. (But, damn...wouldn't that be awesome?)

You do not speak to your mother that way! (Spoken exactly as my mom used to say it to me)


MommyK said...


Some to add:

"Please get your fingers out of your sister's nose."

"Did you poop? Or just toot? Come here, let me smell your butt."

"We do NOT lick trash cans! EVER!"

"Yes, I see that your penis is sticking up. Stop pulling on it and it will go down." (Oh, the joys of little boys.)

"Are you bleeding? Any bones sticking out? Are you having a seizure? Did a bug fly in your ear? No? Then it's not an emergency. Go away. I'm on the phone."

Anonymous said...

Ooooohhhh....I like the hair barf one the best. Totally disgusting and yet completely HIGHlarious.

molly said...

Laughed out loud at the tampon one. Just struck me funny. And you asked "who" as if there was any doubt. hahaha.

Katie said...

Right...like John gets up at 5 a.m. and scatters tampons around the house! :)

Tracy said...

Katie, I just love you!

sgtsharp said...

word verification is fried. too cool

Andrea and Ben said...

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA! Good thing there wasn't liquid in my mouth or it would have shot through my nose onto the computer screen.