Sunday, October 18, 2009

Putting the AWK! in Awkward

Here we have another example of how I punish myself by doing dumb things like trying to make an appointment at a portrait studio and trying to get everyone bathed, dressed, fed, slept and in a good mood at the same 10 minute window.

Then, when we get to the studio, the "photographer" is some punk who has no way with children whatsoever (why would they put him in a primarily kids' photography studio?) and gives up after taking about 15 photos. Here is what the guy must have been thinking:

Ahhh. A group shot. Let's see. Everyone's eyes are open! Great! We're done here.
I told the girl to smile and she did. Click. Good. Done. Next?Gee. I think I'll place this child on a giant black set of steps and then not zoom in at all.

And, I think I'll stop after only two photos in this pose. Because they are turning out so well.

Next, I think I'll pose people in the dumbest pose and then take a couple photos, never telling the people that they look ridiculous.

And finally I will give this mother hope after taking this shot by telling her "it actually looks like the baby is smiling in that one!" And, of course, I won't tell her to sit up straight and suck her belly in....because I am desperately trying to win the honor of World's Worst Photographer!


Marie Green said...

So you seriously got ZERO pictures that you like? That's a shame because you were all dressed mighty cute.

Also, did you have to pay anything for such a horrible photographer?

Katie said...

There was no sitting fee. I bought two poses that were Not That Great. And then, of course, we HAD to buy the group shot just because it was so horrid and funny.

Angie said...

That stinks to not even get one good one. I really don't understand in the digital age why any photographer would take less than 50 photos, though that seems low to me when you are talking about multiple poses.

Jen said...

Bwaahaha! Those are GREAT! I usually end up buying at least one where the kids are crying because, really, it has captured life as we know it.

Laura said...

Although I don't comment often, I have to say that I love your blog and this one had me laughing out loud! Soooo the pictures; not so great, but your commentary is a fine piece of comedy to put it all in perspective!

Great for the memory books, right?

Natalie said...

This is the exact reason I don't do family/kid photos. We have one scheduled at the end of the month and I'm dreading it!

But, you do get some funny ones! We don't even get that!

MommyK said...

Judging by the "zazzle" written across the pictures, I'm assuming you went to The Picture People?

I used to love their pictures and the one time I took my kids in, the photographer was great and really worked with my kids to get some cute shots. But the last time we were there, it was a complete nightmare. And the pictures were boring. I mean, seriously, I can take a photo of my kid standing in front of a white background with his hands at his sides and smiling like he's got gas all by myself for free at home.

Sorry it didn't go so well! One of my friends is a great amateur photographer and I'm seriously considering paying her to come to my house and take pics of my kids.

Kristi said...

I SO love Becca's face in the first one.

lisa said...

You need to find someone who does photography as a hobby and just takes pictures in a "natural" setting. I won't let you put bad studio portraits all over your mantle. I love you too much for that. Your love affair with the studio portraits cracks me up. It makes for great blog fodder too. If you keep doing it you just might be one of those families that ends up on that blog....I cant think of what it is called now. Anyway- they put up funny pictures with commentary- much like you did here. Enough with the AWK in Awkward....just STOP. ;)

Andrea and Ben said...

HAHAHAHA! I am sooooo glad you bought that horrible group shot - I would have too! You crack me up with the photo shoots. You have some incredible pics of your kids that you have taken. I think it is that you are a glutten for punishment. Yup, that's it!

Side note - my word verification is almost maniacle, almost. Is that how you spell it?