Ceiling fans are on.
I'm wearing short sleeves. My hair is blowing in a perfectly lovely breeze.
See? Hair? In breeze? I mopped the floor this morning. I was so inspired by that I decided to pull everything out of my closet and re-organize. But then I got tired of doing that and left this crap all over the floor.
Then I took the kids to the park for two glorious hours. Everyone had a great time. It is warm! And sunny! And things are blooming.
See? No? Well...things are almost blooming.
I came home, thrilled to open the doors to my newly shining floors. When, what should I behold but some kind of....infestation.
It looked like a nest of flying ants had hatched in one corner of the living room and was in the process of migrating to the open window across the (formerly) clean floor.
There were hordes of them. And piles of wings. And couples of them mating. I would show you a picture but I vacuumed them up so fast. Also, I want to spare you the gag reflex. Because I care about you. But let me tell you....It was a swarm! A plague! (pestilence?) Dis. Gusting.
I googled termites. And I diagnosed them as termites (I am nearly flawless in my google diagnoses afterall).
So, you see. That is why I'm sitting here.
On the window seat. With my "Keep calm and carry on" mug from a fabulous friend. I'm here watching for the exterminator. Where is he?? I need him to arrive now, please. I saved him a parking spot.
Have you ever had a real swarm in your house? I don't recommend it. I really can't get down from this window seat. I can't. What if more flying ant/termites of doom have arrived downstairs?
Hey! Look! The annoying dude down the street is kissing his girlfriend by his annoying hot rod car. That punk is so annoying.
Oh man. Rebecca's toenail is peeling off. Guess I have to run. Thanks for waiting here with me. It was a nice little break from The Crazy.