Proving it is possible to be tense and lazy at the same time.
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
It feels like my whole life was spent changing, moving, re-adjusting, settling in, having a big life event, and then re-doing it all again. Zigging and zagging, constantly changing. Nothing staying the same. Going off to college, transferring to another college, getting married. Moving, moving. Moving again. To a border town in Texas, to Alaska, to New England, to Las Vegas, to Korea, back to Alaska. Having a baby. Leaving the Air Force, moving to the East Coast. Having another baby. Adjusting. And....then....now we have been settled here for almost 6 years. HOLY SHIT. 6 YEARS!!!! And it is kind of just......a straight road. Not a whole lot of changes. Here come the tulips in the same place as last year. Oh. I guess it has been two years since we had the deck stained. I think that is partially why I haven't been as active blogging. Things have evened out. We have a definite rhythm that we never had before. It is good. I wonder if the robins will return and lay eggs again this spring? Look how big that rosemary plant has gotten. It is good. And it is boring.
I'm in a loop:
Every fall I get all anxious about all the fall events, holidays, birthdays, Mommy crap. I have a near anxiety melt-down over pulling off a perfect stress-free Christmas.
And then every January I get on here and bitch about winter and wanting to go to Texas. And for all of February every year I am on realty websites picking out our new house in Texas. Every other post for the past few years has been about how homesick I am for Texas.
And then every spring I decide it is beautiful and great here.
And then every summer we travel all over and do a million things and generally love life.
And then every late summer I grumble about when is school going to start and why do I live so far from my family.
Is this normal? My mother in law says I'm restless. Maybe that is all it is.
I feel like it just brings on middle age so fast. Everything is so predictable. I want to pull the kids out of school, sell the house, rent an RV, buy a homeschool curriculum and just GO. Be adventurous.
I am a full-time child wrangler and shit schlepper. I am married to the funniest man in America and have two kids who like to keep toads in a terrarium. I enjoy classical singing, napping and Ruffles sour cream and cheddar chips.