Oh man. We're back home again. Home and worn out. I'm pretty sure Becca and I slept about half our usual amount while in Austin. Who goes on "vacation" and comes home worn out? Oh, right. Everyone.
Our favorite airline has changed their boarding practices. So, now the pre-boarders with children go on after the first boarding group, which really must seem a lot better to all those business people who get their boarding passes ahead of time and stand at the front of the line glaring at the mayhem that is pre-boarding. It does seem to make it go faster and I have no problem with it whatsoever. I really don't. Whatever gets us there.
The car seat? Now, that bitch DOES have a problem with it. You should have seen me trying to get that damn thing down the aisle to the back of the plane. I think I may need this contraption. Because I was schwacking every single aisle seat passenger on the way. And, any aisle seat that wasn't occupied, beckoned to Becca (hmmm....sounds like a rock band) and she climbed up and started making herself comfortable. Meanwhile, I had to turn around to grab her, thus smacking yet another person with the damn carseat. I tried having Becca walk in front of me, but then she started grabbing everyone's legs and not moving at all. People saw us coming and were ducking madly for the middle seats.
So. We got to our seats. Got all buckled down. Started off well. Until.....(dum dum DUMMMMMMM)....the poopy diaper. I am used to this airplane stuff now. I have a special little ziplock filled with wipes, diapers, disposable changing pads and antibacterial wipes for this very purpose. I expertly grabed it and Becca and headed to the rear lavatory. Where there was no changing station. "It is an older airplane," the flight attendant explains.
I guess babies didn't have poopy diapers back when it was made.
There was no way I was going to change it at our seats in a FULL plane. Right next to some poor lady. No way. The entire back half of the plane would have had to evacuate. They would have to just throw that airplane away and get another one.
This left only one option. The toilet seat lid. Now, you must remember, I am a Germaphobe. Big time. Especially in bathrooms and in airports and airplanes. So, you must imagine this. I am holding Becca, who somehow has no shoes on (I know! I have a baby Britney!) and trying to sanitize the entire area around the toilet and that nasty little shelf that is under it and has lots of mysterious puddles on it.
Then, I am carefully laying down the disposable changing pads. Then, I am laying Becca down on the toilet seat lid, head back against the wall, butt kind of resting on my legs, SCREAMING at her not to touch anything, because HOLY CRAP I didn't sanitize the walls.
I could go on, but I don't really want you to lose your breakfast. Plus, it is almost midnight and I really should go to bed. Only one small problem. John was totally AWESOME today--that isn't the problem, but I'm getting there-- and "fathered" while I took an hour and a half nap. It was heaven. Plus, he brought me dark chocolate M&Ms and Buffalo and Ranch Doritos at the airport. Then, we stopped at Five Guys for cheeseburgers and the best french fries in the WORLD. Then, I made a giant batch of nachos after Becca went to bed. And now, I can't sleep. Go figure.
One Year Later
2 days ago
10 comments:
too funny! I must say, the silly people that thought that up were not thinking so well. Of course you want the people with kids in the front. I know I wouldn't want to get hit by a carseat if I didn' have kids, and I wouldn't want kids running around without a carseat. It is a crazy circle. I guess we can't complain too much huh? I think it might be time for me to get rid of the carseat on the airplane.. Yikes!
There is a great trick - teach them to get changed standing up. I know, it sounds impossible, but in tight situations like the airplane bathroom, changing standing up is a wonderful thing to have learned. Big plus - less germy surfaces to touch. It's like early toilet training, since you are wiping while they are standing. (I will point out that loose poopy is NOT a good candidate for this tactic. Formed is doable, but not as easy as just wet.) It does take some practice, but it has been a lifesaver in some situations.
Well I feel your pain on this, those bathrooms are horrifying, even for me (definitely NOT a germaphobe)
How do you do it? I guess you've gotta do something. I definitely give parents so much credit for what they do. Honestly, some day I hope I'm as good as you are.
I like your idea of just throwing away the airplane and getting another one. They had to do that after me once - and now, talk about germs, they just transport me in a cattle car!
Hook 'Em!
I so understand the whole car seat thing. I have a backpack for mine which allows for my hands to be free but it is HUGE. I checked out the CARES contraption and that looks pretty cool. If you get one, let me know how it works out. However, the nice thing about a car seat, is that Bo will actually sleep in it if he's tired enough and I don't think he would do that it a regular seat. I think airline travel just sucks with a toddler no matter what yo do.
OH MY GOD. I would have freaked out completely. ICK ICK ICK. I hate airplane bathrooms!! You write this with such a calm tone - I am impressed!
I hope you got some sleep.
Ew.
ewwwww. i think you came up with the only viable option, but ewwwww. i don't know what i'd do.
yet another experience i get to look forward to!
I couldn't stand traveling with a carseat anymore, so we bought one and left it at my moms house. You come to Texas so often, it might be to your benefit to have one here.
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